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Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Stop Pretending and Be There



You ask me how I'm feeling,
but do you really want to know?
The moment I try telling you
You say you have to go

How can I tell you,
what it's been like for me?
I am haunted, I am broken
By things that you don't see

You ask me how I'm holding up,
but do you really care?
The moment I start to speak my heart,
You start squirming in your chair.

Because I am so lonely, you see,
friends no longer come around,
I'll take the words I want to say
And quietly choke them down.

Everyone avoids me now,
I guess they don't know what to say
They told me I'll be there for you,
then turned and walked away.

Call me if you need me,
that's what everybody said,
But how can I call and screaming to the phone,
My God, my child is dead?

No one will let me say the words
I need to say
Why does a mothers grief
scare everyone away?

I am tired of pretending
my heart hammers in my chest
I say things to make you comfortable
but my soul finds no rest

How can I tell you things
that are too sad to be told
of the helplessness of holding a child who in your arms grows cold?

Maybe you can tell me
How should one behave
who's had to follow their child's casket
watched it perched above a grave

You cannot imagine what it was like
for me that day
to place a final kiss upon that box
and have to turn and walk away

If you really love me
and I believe you do
if you really want to help me
here is what I need from you

Sit down beside me
reach out and take my hand
Say " My friend, I've come to listen
I want to understand."

Just hold my hand and listen
that's all you need to do
And if by chance I shed a tear,
it's alright if you do too...
I swear I'll remember till the day I’m very old the friend who sat and held my hand so I could bare my soul...


- Unknown

3 comments:

  1. Sarah Abbott DowlinAugust 14, 2013 at 2:51 AM

    I am here to listen and hold your hand any time. I am available to message, text or call- I don't even mind driving to comfort you. I know that ache you feel, tho its never quite exactly the same. You can yell at me, I understand...there are still times I look up and scream "WHY? WHY MY CHILD??" We may not be BFF's but in my heart you are like a sister, sharing a bond most just don't quite get. <3

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  2. Raebeth, I know I do not know exactly what you are feeling as I have never lost a child as you did. Let me say my heart totally goes out to you, I wish I could say something other than hugs and I am sorry for your lost. I know that you are tired of hearing that. This poem just had me in tears as I wish I could say the right thing to you. Just know that my thoughts and prayers are with you.

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  3. Wow, i really wish i could physically be there for you as reading this i felt it was written just for me!! I love you beth and think about you daily! Even though i cant be there in person, i am only a phobe call away!

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