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Thursday, November 14, 2013

Dads...How To Help During Loss?

I've noticed one thing since our Dakota lost her wings. Most of the time Daddy's are forgotten. I see all types of graphics for the Mom's, websites, and social media sites that reflect the situations for the mother. We must remember the Fathers too.

At times when you see a grieving father, you won't see that he is hurting. Men tend to bottle up their emotions and come off as being the strong, supportive one. In truth, his emotions on the inside are in just as bad of shape as Mommy.

So, here is my message to all the Daddy's of Angels: 

Remember there are people out there who reconize your hurt and your pain. Just because you didn't feel your angels movements or carry them inside of you, doesn't mean your pain is any less. Stand up and speak out. Be honest. In the time of grief, you don't need to hold it all together. It's okay to hurt and it's okay to cry. Don't be afraid to talk about your baby. The more you talk about them, the more your heart will heal.

While you are grieving, don't forget your wife and children. At times, you may feel the need to push the word away and go into your own place. When you do this, without realizing it, you're hurting your family. Talk to your wife. She needs to know that you hurt too. Let her know she's not alone and that you feel it too.

Protect your wife from those who may not be fit for her in this very emotional time. If you know a person who can potentially create more heartache for your wife, tell them to go. Don't be afraid to be the bad guy. This goes to the same with your grieving children. This will show them that no matter what, they have you to protect them. You will ensure the safety of their hearts.

The most important of all, don't run from God. Go to Him. He will protect and shelter your heart, while you are protecting your family. Don't allow the mixed feelings inside to let you question God's worth. He is there to help mend you and to help carry you through. Pray and do it often. Tell the Lord your needs and allow Him to fix them. Believe me, when the time is right... He will!!

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